Unconditionally Guaranteed, the universally derided album from Captain Beefheart and The Magic Band is commonly regarded as the nadir of the Captain’s career, the pariah among the pearls. From the cover depicting a weasel-eyed Beefheart clutching fistfuls of money to the lightweight and accessible tunes centring on themes of love, sex and happiness, people claim to hate this album with a burning passion. Even Beefheart wrote it off, insisting that buyers should take it back to the shop and get their money back, taking advantage of the guarantee…